Wrap-Up: Parenting – Lost in Translation

Don’t you just love coming home and having something new to think about for the rest of the week? Today’s guest speaker – Laurie Schellenberg – provided plenty of food for thought as she shared about her own experiences as a mom and the importance of understanding your child’s unique gifts and love languages.

She referenced a number of books that you can pick up if you’re looking for more information on this subject:

  • Discover Your Children’s Gifts (also Discover Your God-Given Gifts and Discover Your Spouse’s Gifts) by Don + Katie Fortune
  • The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
  • Hold On To Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld

We talked a lot about the idea of nature vs nurture and how it’s very common for our children to take after one parent or the other (or a combination) but how understanding the colour of lenses in the sunglasses they are born with can help us communicate love and deal with parenting challenges – in THEIR language, and not necessarily in ours.

Later during our group discussion, many moms shared about their struggle to get their husbands to engage in these types of books and ideas and a couple of great strategies were shared:

  • When you’re reading something that really speaks to you, try writing that passage or idea on an index card. You might have 10 or 15 index cards at the end of a really fabulous parenting book – and your husband will likely be much more willing to read (and discuss) those ideas vs reading an entire book.
  • One mom shared about a weekend trip to Grand Forks that she took with her husband. While they were driving there, she read to him from a parenting book – then put the book away for the weekend once they arrived. On the way home, they read again and had some great talks about it.
  • When you’re excited about a book, make the focus SELF improvement. If you think your husband could benefit too, don’t push it on him as a self improvement thing… Make the focus YOUR positive change, and encourage him to read it as a way to better understand the changes he’s seeing (and likely appreciating) in you. Who knows… He might end up turning the focus on himself as he’s reading, and then EVERYONE benefits.

What was the biggest idea or piece of information that you walked away with after our talk today? What would you write on your ‘index card’ from this morning?


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